We were desperate!
It was a looong day, one of those days where you feel like you were limping across the finish line as a parent. I’ve been stressed lately with upcoming life decisions and tired from a crazy busy schedule with trips to Africa, and a week long summer camp right on top of the other. The kids did not get Jesus from mom and dad. Instead they got two milder versions of the Incredible Hulk. I was irritable, noises seemed louder, and Tirzah appeared to be closer to my face and in my bubble more than usual. Everything was at a heightened level of crazy. We finally got the kids down and dragged ourselves to bed, contemplating whether to brush our teeth or not. We’ve made it a practice to pray at night before we go to bed, but this night it seemed so tempting just to roll over and close our eyes.
PAUSE.
Maybe you’ve been here. Maybe I just described a scene from your house yesterday. You’re not alone. Hear me on this dad! You are in the process. You have good days as a father and you have bad days. You have times where you represent Jesus well and times where you do not. So lift your head! You are not alone. But I want to show you the most vital weapon in your parenting arsenal: Praying with your wife!
UNPAUSE.
Fighting the urge to just collapse straight into REM, Lydia and I share a few instances of how we both blew it with the kids, and then…we prayed. Here is what made this specific time of prayer so powerful to me: we were desperate. So here are 4 reasons praying with your wife will revolutionize the way you dad!
- Reminder of your inability and God’s ability. 101 in biblical parenting it to understand that you can’t change your child’s heart, only God can. We lose sight of this far too much and thus why we need reminded so often. Prayer is the action that demonstrates dependence.
- Unites you to your Ezer Kenegdo. These crazy Hebrew words used in Genesis 1-2 mean “helper” or more accurately a military ally. That’s right! You always knew your woman was fine wine, but now picture her in a pair of fatigues and military boots! You and her come around the war table to talk strategy for your family because there’s a battle raging. If you want to feel more unified with your wife the #1 way to get it is by going to battle together in prayer.
- A time to receive grace. Prayer is like a reset button on your day or your situation. The Bible is clear that those who are in Christ abound in grace. Grace does not excuse sin but it covers it and reminds us of who we are. Grace calls us UP, not OUT. Prayer is the conduit of grace in your life. If you do not allow yourself to receive grace then it will damage your children because hurting people hurt people
- Course corrects you. Just like a ship that realizes it is off course, praying together steers the ship back toward Christ. When you lack patience, when you feel emotionally exhausted, when you had a flash of anger, prayer realigns your heart with the heart of the Ultimate Father. When you are doing this with your wife, speaking these things out loud together before Jesus has a unique power.
There are more reasons why every father needs to pray with his woman for their children, but we are going to stop here. It is vital. It is powerful. And it is the most neglected thing in our families. Let’s be a generation of men who pray not just for our wives but with our wives and watch these prayers change us and our children! Onward and upward Lion-Hearted men!