Washing Feet and Changing Diapers:
Here are a couple of highlights recapping our series so far:
- Leadership is heading towards a destination and taking others with you.
- Leading your family begins with passionately pursuing Jesus.
- Passion to pursue Jesus comes from spiritual hunger and humility.
Today we discuss how to empower our families: servant leadership. Instead of defining it, I’ll describe it.
Jacob (not his real name), is a former Muslim who upon accepting Christ felt compelled to reach Muslim refugee groups with the Gospel. He left his home, and went to live among the refugees in their camps. During the day he would minister to them by sharing the Gospel and spending time with them. At night he would sleep on the streets. When morning came he would do it all over again. God used him to bring hope into a place of hopelessness. Willing to live among poverty stricken people, taking on their very way of life: this is servant leadership.
“But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be your slave, even as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many” (Matthew 20:26–28).
Greatness=servanthood. Think of the greatest leaders. Not the most accomplished ones, but the ones that had the most impact upon you or those they led. The common denominator is servanthood. Last week I said you can’t take someone where you haven’t gone. This could not be more true in the area modeling servanthood in your family.
Fatherhood is riddled with opportunity to serve. From dirty dishes to dirty diapers the list is endless. That’s good news for you and I! It means everyday I am presented with moments to serve. The Lion-Hearted Man seeks out opportunity to serve his family believing that no task is too small for him to do. Paul is a example of this. Paul was the director of the college program I was apart of a couple of years back. For Paul there was no task that was below him. He was always taking the trash out, buying people lunch, leaving things better than how he found them, quick to help carry things, and always available if you needed him. Not only was he this way at the office but he lived this out at home. Through seeing Paul’s kids and other families like his I’ve observed 3 lessons from servant leaders…
Servant leadership will:
- Kill the entitlement mentality. This seems to be at the heart of our culture. “I deserve this”, “I am worth more than this”, “I’ll go where I’m valued”, “You can’t ask me to do that.” I don’t know whether to laugh or cry because it’s both comical and damaging. I for one do NOT want my kids growing up thinking anyone owes them anything. Servanthood kills entitlement. When we fathers show them the way of a servant, then entitlement loses it grasp on our children. For a great laugh you have to watch Jon Crist’s sketch on entitlement!
- Gain you the respect of your kids. Children are tiny people. They function the same as adults do just on a smaller scale, which means that you will gain their respect the same way you do of your peers, through serving. As your kids gain independence your role as a parent will shift from oversight to influence. Your influence will be the strongest if your children respect you. Start earning respect now by showing the way of a servant.
- Demonstrate the Gospel. As fathers we are in-the-flesh representations of our Heavenly Father. When we follow Christ’s example who, “emptied himself, by taking the form of a servant” (Phil 2:7) then our children see the heart of Jesus and the heart of the Gospel. As one who desperately wants my children to know God I am realizing that I can help them best by how I live out the Gospel. Jesus came not to be served but to serve.
No task is too small. No diaper too dirty. Fatherhood is a call to empty ourselves for our wife and kids. Only Jesus can help us do this. Leading our homes begins with you and I rolling up our sleeves and demonstrating on the daily who Jesus is: a leader and a servant.
What’s one way you could model this servant mentality today towards your wife or kids?